Restaurants Rant (RestauRant) 

Seeing some memes blaming restaurant failures on customers eating at home more and, uh, anyone eating at home more should easily see the signs of the real killer: the weird fluctuations in grocery stock, the annoying fluctuations in food prices, the empty shelves in supermarkets that used to pride themselves on the illusion of never having empty shelves, and so on …


Restaurants Rant (RestauRant) 

Most restaurants are designed to survive on low customer volume. Many restaurants survive most years on two or four Big Nights around the holidays.

What they can’t survive: fluctuations in food prices and availability.

The Global Logistics Crisis we are facing, that’s the killer. (Or you can unmask it further and just blame Capitalism.)

Restaurants Rant (RestauRant) 

“Supply Side Economics” jerks: See, supply side economics means money “trickle down” to the working class.

Narrator: It doesn’t.

*A Supply Side Crisis Emerges*

Same jerks: See, the real problem is everyone eating at home. Consumers are really to blame here.

Narrator: It isn’t. They aren’t.

Restaurants Rant (RestauRant) 

Sure some restaurants didn’t even get those two or four Big Nights in 2020. But you know who is most to blame there? Delivery apps. Delivery apps statistically easily accounted for the usual volume patterns for restaurants in 2020. But the delivery apps steal tips from restaurants and in some cases steal “fees” and “marketing costs” and more. Consumers were still consuming nearly as much but collectively their dollars were eaten by middlemen.

Restaurants Rant (RestauRant) 

Middlemen like that are a cancerous symptom of, you guessed it, Capitalism for anyone still playing the Scooby Doo Investigations Unmasking At Home Game. Shocking discovery: it’s Old Man Capitalism again

Just because the middlemen are now “apps” and “computer algorithms” doesn’t make them new or less cancerous than when ancient sages (like Adam Smith) becried them antithetical to an efficient free market, but Capitalism doesn’t actually like free markets outside PR.

Restaurants Rant (RestauRant) 

I like throwing in the bon mot about Adam Smith like that because it drives Libertarians nuts to see one of their heroes used like that. I can read 18th Century original sources and not just bumper sticker epitaphs. The Gig Economy isn’t some Libertarian Utopia, it’s exactly the sort of anti-free market bullshit that Adam Smith was railing against as bad and awful. Libertarians, go home you’re drunk

Restaurants Rant (RestauRant) 

The Invisible Hand was a (shitty) metaphor, it was not an ask for machines to over-automate Middleman-as-a-“Service”

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